The Return of the Roar
As I was preparing to write about the return of the roar, a Facebook post by Hillary Lisimba Ambani who is a very good friend of mine, captured my attention. It was so profound I had to call and ask for permission to use it in my blog post. Here it is… The lion is the undoubted king of the jungle. Somehow the not-so-big carnivore managed to grab himself the highest title of the land where rules are not well defined.
I am calling him not-so-big because I’ve seen an elephant, buffalo, rhino even giraffe and these guys are monsters compared to that mammal calling himself the king. The weird thing is that even without size, like those other animals I’ve mentioned, they still respect him.
A lion will still remain a lion regardless of gender, age and location. A tamed lion is still a lion. A cub is a lion. A lioness still is a lion. Even one on its deathbed commands that title until he breathes his last, there and then vultures and hyenas move in swiftly to scavenge what’s left of a counterpart they couldn’t move near.
Reclaiming the Roar
Every individual has the ability to choose to be the lion, the elephant or the vulture. It is all about setting standards and sticking to them even at the lowest point. We all need to understand which aspect of our life produces the loudest roar then use that to rise. It is that roar which sends all other wannabes’ scampering for safety. The roar that announces your arrival and still leaves a resounding echo long after you are gone. And even on your deathbed, give one last roar before passing on so that scavengers are not so quick to descend on your remains until they are sure the coast is clear.
Be a lion.
We are at a point in time when the boy-child and the men he should be looking up to have lost the roar. We are at a point where boys have no other option than to look up to their mothers as their sole role models and sources of inspiration. This reminds of an interview I had with a boy who was appearing in KBC TV’s Sunrise Avenue children’s show.
“Who is your role model?” I asked, believing there was a male role model behind his aspirations to become a musician.
“My mom is my role model and greatest inspiration,” he replied. “She is always there for me. In fact, she is the one who pays for my music classes.”
“What about your dad?” I asked.
“My dad doesn’t even know that I sing and can play a music instrument!” he replied, tears welling in his eyes.
I have met hundreds of women who are crying for the return of the roar in their homes. Most of them have lost their husbands to alcohol, other women, prison, purposelessness and right now; to sports betting. Even though some of the women still have candles burning deep in the night, in the hope that their long-lost husbands may return home, most of them have given up and have instead, chosen the difficult path of guiding boys into manhood. Much as many women – most of them widows, single mothers and divorcees – are capable of providing for their sons, the need for a male role model and a father-figure have left a gaping hole and an empty echoing hollow that aches for a man’s presence and leadership.
Where the Roar Matters the Most
There are millions of women who still have men at home. But the problem is that most of the men have lost; and don’t know where to find their roar. As a man, you may win accolades from your peers in your career and sphere of influence. You may set the trends by calling the shots. But one day, someone else will take your place. The only place where you will not find a replacement is your role as a father and a husband. That is where your roar really matters the most; not in the corporate world, in the bar or the strip club where everyone answers to every snap of your fingers.
Granted. Every woman needs a man who is able to provide and protect his family. However, losing your job or not having any does not relegate your ability to roar. Finding and reclaiming your roar means the whole world to your wife and children. To quote Hillary, every man needs to understand which aspect of his life produces the loudest roar then use that to rise from where he has fallen. As a man, I have discovered that it is easy to lose your roar if you don’t know the value of what you have in your hands. History, and even the Bible, have numerous accounts of men who impacted the world when they used what they had available.
Do you have a wife and children who look up to? Instead of mourning about what you have lost, why don’t you put that energy to good use by reclaiming your roar? Waking up early before everyone, even if you don’t have a job is a source of security to your family. So is taking your time to change your child’s diapers, tucking them to bed and reading them a bed time story. Reclaim your roar by finding that one thing you are good at. Everyone has a talent they have been given by God. When we use our talents to serve humanity they become gifts that open the way and usher us into the presence of kings (Proverbs 18:16).
I have personally found the Bible to be a good tool for reclaiming my roar. I highly recommend it. You can also download the declaration below and hang it on your wall where you can see it. I hope you will find the courage and strength to reclaim your roar as a man. The roar in this case translates to your position in your family and the society. Our nation, and the world at large, needs men who know and use their roar. I hope you will find yours and use it to full effect.
5 Ways You Can Reclaim Your Roar
- Cultivate the love for God in your children by teaching them the Word of God
- Model integrity and discipline in your children
- Encourage and affirm your children
- Bond with your children by changing diapers, making breakfast, tucking them in bed and showing up for their preschool graduation
- Wake early before everyone does and find work in an area where you are gifted
“Woe to the house where the hen crows and the cock keeps quiet,” Spanish proverb.